Sunil Chhetri's face was etched with these feelings as he departed the field for India in the 89th minute. Arguing with Manveer Singh next to him, Chhetri can only really think of another missed opportunity for India, which has been the tale of much of his 17 years on the national team. Not three minutes ago, his incredible free-kick curled perfectly into the top corner, which should have been its end. Instead, Zubayr Amiri rose unchallenged from a pointless corner and flicked a header past Gurpreet Singh Sandhu to hush the 50,000-plus spectators inside the Salt Lake stadium.
That would've been its end in previous years (and decades). A devastating goal like that in the 88th minute would crush most teams' and players' morale. India was facing the humiliation of failing to qualify from an 'easy' group. Igor Stimac had his gaze fixed on the sack.
Sahal Abdul Samad quietly took Chhetri's place on the pitch.
But, you see, Sahal has seen sorrow, rage, and sadness firsthand. A year ago, Sahal, born on April 1st, had almost become a sick trick in Indian football. Injury and inefficiency conspired almost to eliminate the promise he had shown in his teens, and coach after coach continued to bet against him. He didn't give up. Ivan Vukomanovic unleashed Sahal, who shook off the prevalent narrative and slowly rebuilt his reputation, ninety minutes at a time, goal by goal. He shone, Kerala Blasters shone, and he was thrust back into the spotlight as a genuine hope for Indian football's future. He'd changed the course of his football career.
It was him, of course.
It had to be a Kerala goal when you've recently been paying close attention to all facets of Indian football. Ashique Kuruniyan, who had threatened to lose his mind all night just as he made his marks, regained control in the most vital of situations, intercepting a misplaced pass. Ashique had room and time after a fast flick to evade an impending challenge from Farshad Noor.
Sahal had made a break into space in the middle side of the box - Ashique had found him - and, like the best footballers, slowed time and guided, rather than lashed, the ball passed you feel pain, rage, or sadness? Chhetri's face had vanished, as had the faces of the Indian players, coaches, and fans. All that remained was happiness.
What was the pinnacle of his career? "I believe it is one of the best because it is played in front of the crowd, in Kolkata, and for the national team. I'm pretty pleased with myself "after the game, Sahal remarked even though he had just completed seven minutes of the game, he had reason to be pleased with the Indian effort as a whole. Over the years, Stimac has had his fair share of flak, but he deserves respect for yet another courageous selection. As Indians played their finest football since the Stimac era, promise exuded from every position on the field. The next wave of Indian kids flitted across the field, creating beautiful patterns as they produced chance after chance.
This was Afghanistan, which isn't precisely a footballing powerhouse in Asia - and the job isn't done yet. Even nights like that are why Chhetri's 37-year-old legs continue to run and why he remains eternally ready to pass the baton.
India has been conspiring to squander Chhetri's brightest moments since dawn. The remarkable success in India is a dismal return for a man of his abilities. It's a harrowing tale and one that came dangerously close to being repeated tonight. Sahal Abdul Samad and the next generation of Indian footballers are here to help. They may not be as brilliant as Chhetri, but perhaps, just maybe, the next generation has what it takes to turn India's football story around from one of magnificent defeat to one of triumph.
There are no adjectives or descriptions. Put, victory.
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